A day in the life

So today I took the boys to the grocery store, back home to drop off the items that needed refrigeration, and then to a local playground where my Moms Club was having a playgroup. The plan was to play for about an hour and then head to swimming lessons at 11am. I noticed Georgie doing the potty dance at the playground so I called him over and successfully got him to pee on a tree. Feeling proud, I returned to my conversations with the other moms. When it was time to go, I rounded up Henry and Georgie and loaded them into the car. When I picked up Georgie I caught a whiff of something not good. Not good at all. "Did you poop your pants?" I asked. "Yep!" he answered. Like, no big deal.

So I drive to the pool, fuming, with the windows down. We get there and I send Henry into the men's locker room while I tackle the poop disaster with George in the ladies'. It was so gross, you cannot even imagine. I mean, most poop is not exactly pleasant, but this one was particularly foul. As I was rinsing out his boxer shorts in the toilet my oversensitive gag reflex kicked in and I puked into the toilet. So now we have not only stunk up the locker room with poop, but also with vomit. Lovely.

So I get Mr. Poopypants all cleaned up and put his swim trunks on and haul him out to the pool. Where he announces to the instructor, "I crapped my pants."

Later, I was talking to another parent there and he said, "I saw Henry waiting outside the pool gate, I asked him if he wanted in (kids can't reach the latch to get into the pool area) and he said that he was waiting for his mom and his brother, and that his brother had pooped his pants REALLY BAD."

Seriously, if this doesn't get our pool membership revoked, I will be surprised.